KYIV UNEDITED

“Could you top this one up, John… that is, if it’s not too much trouble?” “Sure Mr. Soiree. Just let me finish washing up these dishes.” “Certainly, certainly, John,” coughs…

“Come on kids. Don’t lag behind or you’ll get lost in the crowd.” “Dad, why is everyone speaking Chinese,” asks the little boy. “Papa, I wanna see the Animal Boy…

Not an MF Journal Installment So I end up offering Smith a hundred smackers in the form of a rolled note, legal tender, for the shots he took of me…

“ARE you WELSH LOSSER?” “No.” A leathery backhand smacks flat against an alcoholic cheek, but the recipient of the blow remains silent… not because he’s tough or even trying to…

Losser murders Lard’s PR Consultant Hos in unconscious sex act Aaaaahhh, when last we left them, Welsh Losser, just back from Venus, was headed aggressively toward PR Consultant Hos in…

Wu finds alternative, perfect Baby Losser on toxic waste dump We are afresh in Boss Lard’s Kyiv Poster office – the place where Lard kicks back and takes the piss,…

Top Fem Girl beds Lard to gain control of the paper “Well Henna, I’d say you are 100% Fem – with just enough Girl to keep things saucy.” The Fem…

Intercepted un-bowdlerized from What’s Off magazine Pull quote: “I left the Kyiv Poster on principle and very much on my own terms…” What’s Off Chief Editor Lava Encole: So, uh,…

“Are you finished sweeping up there, Stephan?” “Yeah… just trying to get at a few stubborn cobwebs.” “Well, you’re pretty stubborn yourself, son,” says the older but still well-built man.…

A Viking mead hall – capacious; huge. A massive smorgasbord way off to one side – but the hall is so huge, it bends with the curvature of the Earth,…